End-of-Year Burnout Is Real

It starts subtly, maybe. A little more friction in the morning. More resistance to brushing teeth or packing a backpack. More whining, tears, or blank stares when it's time for homework.

Then it builds.

The math worksheet leads to a meltdown. The ask to empty the dishwasher turns into a shouting match. You walk into their room and find work they swore they’d done… untouched. And suddenly, it feels like every small request becomes a full-blown battle.

You're walking on eggshells, trying not to trigger another explosion. They're snapping over nothing — and so are you.This is what the end of the school year often looks like in families navigating ADHD, anxiety, or both--or honestly, even those that aren't . And it’s not because your child has stopped caring. It’s not because you’re doing something wrong.

It’s burnout.

Why May Feels So Hard

May is the Thursday night of the school year. Everyone’s tired, but no one’s done. The routines that once worked are fraying. Your patience is thinner. Their motivation has evaporated. And the calendar keeps filling with projects, exams, transitions, and emotional landmines. For our kids (of any age!)this stretch can feel impossible.

They’ve spent the year managing tasks that ask more of them than their nervous systems are wired to give. They’ve worked extra hard to focus, self-regulate, remember things, manage expectations, and "keep it together" in environments not always built with their brains in mind.

By May, they’re running on fumes. So when we say, “You’ve only got a few weeks left!”, it might feel encouraging to us. But to a burned-out kid, it sounds like:“Keep sprinting on legs that already gave out.”

What Burnout Really Looks Like

This isn’t just being “tired of school.” Burnout in kids shows up in ways that are often misread as laziness or defiance.

It looks like:

• Saying “I don’t care” about everything (even the things they love)

• Avoiding basic routines that used to be manageable

• Explosive emotions over tiny requests

• Constant fatigue or retreating into screens and silence

• Saying “I’m stupid,” or “I can’t do anything right”

These aren’t discipline problems. They’re coping strategies — a stressed brain trying to conserve energy or protect itself from more shame, failure, or effort it just doesn’t have left to give.

And What About You?

Let’s not skip over this part: Parents burn out, too.Especially when you’ve been in support mode for months — coaching through tough mornings, decoding behavior, emailing teachers, setting limits, soothing meltdowns, and carrying the invisible weight of all of it.

Maybe your compassion is running low. Maybe your patience is thin. Maybe you're doing that end-of-year whisper-yell: “Just get through it.”

You're not a bad parent. You're a tired one.

So What Actually Helps?

First, know this: more pressure won’t fix burnout. Pushing harder doesn’t work when the system is already overloaded.

What your child needs — and what you need — is relief, not more expectation.Not a total abandonment of structure, but a gentle shift in focus:

• From performance to support

• From fixing to co-regulating

• From perfect to good enough for now

Here’s what that might look like:

1. Shift from performance to support

Instead of asking, “Why aren’t you doing this?”, ask: “What would help this feel doable today?”

🛠 Try: “Let’s just pick one thing to finish, and I’ll sit with you while you do it.”

2. Make room for “good enough”

This is the time to lower the bar, not raise it. Survival mode isn’t forever, but it is real.

🛠 Try: 3-item to-do lists. “Must do, should do, nice to do.” When the tank is empty, we focus on musts only.

3. Co-regulate before you coach

When emotions are high, logic doesn’t land. Lead with connection.

🛠 Try: “I can see you’re overwhelmed. I get it. Let’s take a breath together and figure this out.”

4. Check your own burnout, too

If your compassion is running low, or you want to hide in the pantry, that’s a signal—not a failure. You need tending, too.

🛠 Try: Tag in a partner, friend, or just build in 10 minutes of silence for yourself. You’re not a robot.

You’re Not Failing. This Season Is Just Hard.

If your child seems like they’re falling apart right now — it’s not because they’re lazy or oppositional. It’s because they’re tired. Overloaded. Out of fuel.

And if you’re unraveling a little, too? It makes sense. The end-of-year squeeze is real.

This is the moment to get curious instead of critical, to lower the bar with love, and to lean into connection, not correction. You're not behind. Your child is not broken. And you are not failing. You're just human — raising a human — in a season that asks a lot from both of you.

Need support for your child’s burnout — or your own? This is what I do. I work with parents of ADHD and anxious kids to create practical strategies that reduce power struggles, increase connection, and make daily life feel more doable.

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