Why Spring Fever Sparks Friendship Drama

You get a call from school—your child snapped at a classmate during group work. Last week, they said they didn’t want to go to the end-of-year party. Now they’ve started sitting alone at lunch—or clinging to one friend like a life raft. And you’re left wondering: what’s going on?

Maybe you chalk it up to “spring fever.” But beneath the silliness, resistance, or emotional outbursts, there’s often something deeper—especially for kids with ADHD or anxiety. This season brings more than sunshine and countdowns. For many kids, spring brings social strain, nervous system overload, and an invisible emotional cost.

Why Spring Isn’t Just Spring

Yes, the days are longer. Yes, kids are more restless. But what we call “spring energy or spring fever” is often a response to chaos.

One of my "kids" Maya, is a sophomore who thrives on routine. All year, she's navigated high school by knowing exactly what to expect: first period at 8:15, lunch with the same three friends at table 12, chemistry lab every Tuesday. But suddenly it's May, and everything shifts. There's spirit week with backwards day and pajama day. Her English class is doing group presentations instead of individual essays. The cafeteria is closed for prom setup, so lunch happens in the gym. Her friends are stressed about finals and snapping at each other over nothing.

Maya finds herself crying in the bathroom between classes, not because anything terrible happened, but because nothing feels predictable anymore. Schedules get weird. Routines loosen. Schools shift to group projects, special events, and transitions. Predictability starts to dissolve—and for neurodivergent kids like Maya, that can be destabilizing.

And then there's the social stuff. When everyone's already on edge from the chaos, friendships get tested. The group chat that used to be funny memes becomes a minefield of inside jokes that exclude someone, or stress-fueled arguments about who's not pulling their weight in the final project. Kids who've been solid friends all year suddenly can't stand each other's nervous energy.

Schedules get weird. Routines loosen. Schools shift to group projects, special events, and transitions. Predictability starts to dissolve—and for neurodivergent kids, that alone is destabilizing.

The Social Strain Is Real

Spring is full of unstructured “fun.” But for many kids, unstructured means unsafe. Group projects with unclear expectations. Recess and field days that throw off the rhythm of friendship dynamics. Social groups reshuffling, growing tighter—or shutting others out.

Endings are everywhere. Saying goodbye to a teacher or aide. Watching friend groups shift before summer break. Navigating the uncertainty of what’s next.

Even positive change—like a break from school—comes with emotional weight. And kids don’t always know how to name that. So instead, it leaks out sideways: irritability, withdrawal, clinginess, emotional outbursts.

One mom recently told me, “My daughter came home from school and locked herself in the bathroom because her best friend played with someone else at recess. She kept saying, ‘I don’t know why I feel like this.’”

That’s the thing about social strain. It’s often invisible—until it explodes.

What It Might Look Like

Spring social dysregulation doesn’t always look “social.” It might look like:

• Saying “I don’t want to go” to events they were once excited about

• Becoming bossy, irritable, or reactive with friends

• Saying things like “No one likes me” or “I’m so annoying”

• Refusing group activities or team assignments

• Coming home completely drained—even after a “fun” day

It might look like they’re overreacting. But they’re really just reacting—to overstimulation, to shifting dynamics, to feelings that are too big to process in the moment.

Why This Happens

For kids with ADHD, spring throws off the systems they rely on to function: structure, clarity, rhythm. It messes with their internal sense of time (“How many days until summer?” feels either like forever or tomorrow). Their ability to regulate, read the room, or manage group dynamics weakens when they’re overwhelmed.

For kids with anxiety, the unknowns of summer and the emotions around endings stir constant low-level worry. “Will I see my friends?” “What if camp is awful?” “What if next year is harder?” That worry shows up as resistance, overthinking, or irritability.

Many of these kids have been masking—holding it together socially all year long. And by spring, their nervous system simply says: I can’t keep this up.

How to Handle The Drama

1. Let Them Decompress

If your child comes home fried after group-heavy days, assume they need recovery time—not a lecture.

🗣 Try this: “Looks like today was a lot. Want to listen to music, shoot baskets, or just zone out for a bit?”

2. Normalize Social Stress

Let your child know that awkwardness, endings, and social tension are part of spring—and they’re not the only one feeling it.

🗣 Try this: “End-of-year group work can be weird. Sometimes things feel heavy right before they change. It’s okay if it felt off today.”

3. Help Them Process (But Don’t Push It)

When emotions cool, revisit the moment with curiosity—not correction.

🗣 Try this “You seemed upset after school. Want to tell me what felt hard about today—or do you want to just hang out for a bit?”

3. Give a Head's Up

Give your child time to mentally prepare for upcoming changes.

🗣 Try this: “Tomorrow’s field day. Want to talk through what might feel tricky—and what might feel fun? You can feel excited and worried about the same thing. That’s really normal.”

The Big Picture

If your child is clingier, more sensitive, or more reactive lately—they’re probably trying to recalibrate in this transition time, not falling apart. They’re responding to a world that feels less certain, less structured, and more socially complex.

And you’re doing the brave work of walking with them through it.

Right now, focus on staying connected. Help them calm down before you try to talk it through. Make sure they feel safe before you jump into problem-solving. You don't have to fix everything this spring—you just need to stick close enough that they know you see them.

------------------------------------------------------

Need Support Navigating Spring Transitions and Social Strain?

I offer one-on-one consultations as well as small group coaching for parents of ADHD and anxious kids. Together we’ll make a plan that helps your child feel calmer, more connected, and more supported—no matter what this season brings.

👉 Let's chat